She Was So Ugly That Her Face

At Christmas Time I Sat On Santa's Lap. His Fly Was Open ! Boy What A Present He Gave Me !

Sure I Smoked Pot In Hospital. My Wife Won't Let Me Toke At Home.

One Night She Told Me To Put Out The Garbage. I Told Her "you Cooked It, You Take It Out".

It's Tough To Stay Married. My Wife Says No Because She's Tired Then Stays Up And Reads Her Book.

My Wife Has To Be The Worst Cook. In My House, We Pray After We Eat.