One Night She Told Me To Put

With My Wife I Don't Get No Respect. I Made A Toast On Her Birthday To 'the Best Woman A Man Ever Had.' The Waiter Joined Me.

We Want Five Thousand Dollars Or You'll See Your Kid Again.

My Cousin Is Gay, I Always Tell Him That In Our Family Tree, He's In The Fruit Section.

When I Was A Kid I Got No Respect. I Told My Mother, I'm Gonna Run Away From Home. She Said, On Your Mark.

When I Was A Kid, I Never Went To Disneyland. My Ol' Man Told Me Mickey Mouse Died In A Cancer Experiment.