Hillary Has Now Erased All Of Her

Newt Gingrich Wants To Build A Colony On The Moon. Ok, You Say, But Why? Well, He Wants To Be The First American To Get Divorced On The Moon.

John Kerry Went Duck Hunting And He's Doing That To Fulfill His Campaign Pledge To Hunt Down The Ducks And Kill Them Wherever They Are! Kerry Did Pretty Well; He Came Back With Four Ducks And Three Purple Hearts.

That's The First Thing They Teach You In Bowling, By The Way. Don't Press The Ball Against Your Nose. The Other One Is Don't Lick The Pins.

Valentine's Day Money-saving Tips: Break Up On February 13th, Get Back Together On The 15th. In Place Of Bubble Bath, Use Lavender-scented Dish-washing Liquid. Forget Rose Petals. Sprinkle The Bed With Sliced Beets!

Keep In Mind That Your Individual Vote Doesn't Mean Anything.