You Want To Look Younger... Rent Smaller

In Most States You Can Get A Driver's License When You're Sixteen Years Old, Which Made A Lot Of Sense To Me When I Was Sixteen Years Old But Now Seems Insane.

Remember There Is No Way You Can Give The Father Custody Of The Children Without Getting A Divorce.

What I Don't Like About Office Christmas Parties Is Looking For A Job The Next Day.

I Should Have Suspected My Husband Was Lazy. On Our Wedding Day, His Mother Told Me: "i'm Not Losing A Son; I'm Gaining A Couch."

Do I Believe In Witchcraft? I'm The Result Of It.