I'm A Huge Film Star... But You

When You Are Waiting For The Bus And Someone Asks, "has The Bus Come Yet?". If The Bus Came Would I Be Standing Here?

If You Haven't Heard A Good Rumour By 11:00am, Start One.

If You Don't Know How To Meditate At Least Try To Spend Some Time Every Day Just Sitting.

I Don't Like The Beach. I Think We Have No Business At The Beach At All, As A Species. We Don't Belong In The Sea. The Sea Is Full Of Things That Bite Us, Sting Us, Hurt The Soles Of Our Feet, And It's Extremely Cold. When Are We Gonna Take The Hint That The Things That Live In The Sea Don't Like Us?

Chic Murray Once Told Me He Fell In The Street, And A Woman Said To Him, "did You Fall?" He Said, "no, I'm Tryin' To Break A Bar Of Chocolate In My Back Pocket."