If You Live To Be One Hundred,

At Home We Ate Fish Every Friday, As Catholics Were Then Supposed To Do. Being Jewish, I Compromised. I Wore A Hat When I Ate Fish, Out Of Respect For My Own Religion And The Fish's Family.

If I Had Taken My Doctor's Advice And Quit Smoking When He Advised Me To, I Wouldn't Have Lived To Go To His Funeral.

Nice To Be Here? At My Age It's Nice To Be Anywhere.

If You Stay In The Business Long Enough And Get To Be Old Enough, You Get To Be New Again.

Say Goodnight Gracie.