You're A Tourist In Sexual Perversion. I'm

I Could Never Sit Down And Write Jokes.

I Don't Like Comedy. I Like Funny Things. I Don't Like Comedy. Like, Comedy Movies Are Just, 'oh Jesus.'

Everybody Is Different. Some Comedy Is More Musical Like Steven Wright. His Is A Pillar Of Comedy To Me. He Invented A Whole Form And All His Jokes Are Poems. So It's Different. I Wanted To Do It Like George Carlin. Now I Do It Like Me.

Everything's Amazing Right Now, And Nobody's Happy.

Dating Is Horrible, It's Awful. I Don't Get It. It's Like You're Standing There: 'hi. Do You Want To Have Sex And Later Wish You Hadn't?' It's Horrible. And It's Awkward At 42 Because I Don't Have The Body Or The Drive. I Just Sit In The Car And Hope Somebody Gets In.