You Can See A Lot Of Politics

I Have A Friend Who Actually Told Me That She'd Rather Be Dead Than Be Fat. This Is A Woman Who, If I Order A Sandwich At Lunch, She'll Order A Salad. If I Order A Salad, She'll Order Half A Cantaloupe. If I Order Half A Cantaloupe, She'll Order A Cup Of Coffee. This Bizarre Contest Continues Until She's Down To Sucking On A Mint-flavored Toothpick. At This Rate, Her Preference For Dying Over Being Fat Could Be A Reality Sooner Than She Thinks.

You Can See A Lot Of Politics On A Lot Of Different Channels. I'm Not Interested, Really, In Talking In Some Wonky Conversation About Politics, Though. It's Not My Speed. I'm Not Interested In The Ins And Outs Of Health Care.

Statistically, Skinny Women Die Younger Than Fat Women. Why? Because Fat Women Are Killing Them.

I'm Italian, But Some People Think I'm Jewish Because I Work The Yiddish. I Also Work The Italian, By The Way.

I Read The 'new York Times', I Read 'the Nation', I Read 'newsweek', I Read 'time Magazine', I Read 'politico', I Read 'mediaite'. This Is What I Do! I Read Every Day, I Have Interests, I'm Like Everybody Out There Who's Watching, Who's Out There Watching, You Know?