Whether It's A Blatant Homage Or Unconscious

When You're In A Competitive Environment, Always Give Out The Impression That You Don't Care. It Makes People Want You More. If You Act Desperate, It's Over. I Think A Passive Attitude Is Helpful. It Comes Naturally Because I'm Lazy.

A Few Months Ago, I Had The Pleasure Of Actually Visiting The Playboy Mansion. I Saw The Peacocks, Fed Grapes To The Monkeys, And Even Braved The Fabled Grotto. After Seeing The Estate, I Understood Why Anyone Would Be Reluctant To Leave.

Above The Stage Was A Glass-floored Second Stage, Which Allowed Customers To Look Up And Watch Another Girl Dancing Overhead. This Multidimensional Display Of Poontang Reminded Me Of The 3-d Chessboard On Star Trek, Which In Turn Reminded Me That I Was A Huge Nerd.

I Want Maggie Gyllenhaal. I Don't Know Why. I Don't Think She Necessarily Looks Like Me Or Acts Like Me, I Just Think She's A Cool Actress And She Could Play Me, So There You Go.

Hollywood Is A Perpetual Summerland, A Temperate, Godless Yaw Where The Very Word 'season' Has Been Co-opted By Television Executives. There Are Few Harbingers Of Winter Here.