Unless We're Talking About Old-school, Witchcraft-trial Violence,

Every Time I Open The Drawer, It's A Trip Down Memory Lane, Which, If You Don't Turn Off At The Right Exit, Merges Straight Into The Masochistic Nostalgia Highway.

I Don't Understand How You Can Be A Decent Writer And Not Know People.

I Called My Mother Immediately To Inform Her That She Was A Bad Parent. "i Can't Believe You Let Us Watch This. We Ate Dinner In Front Of This." "everyone Watched Twin Peaks," Was Her Response. "so, If Everyone Jumped Off The Brooklyn Bridge, Would You Do It, Too?" "don't Be Silly," She Laughed, "of Course I Would, Honey. There'd Be No One Left On The Planet. It Would Be A Very Lonely Place.

Cats And Their Owners Are On A Private, Exclusive Loop Of Affection. Thus Cats Have Become Symbolic Of A Community Eschewed And A Hyper-engagement With Oneself. They Represent The Profound Danger Of Growing So Independent In New York That It's Not Merely That You Don't Need Anyone - It's That You Don't Know How To Need Anyone.

I Was The Youngest Of My Entire Family So You Are Tap-dancing To Try To Get The Attention Of Your Older Cousins. I Really Hit My Social Stride In 6th Grade, But Before That I Was A Pretty Big Dork. You Learn How To Be Amusing And How To Work For It.