The Two-headed Boy In The Circus Never

It Is Funnier To Bend Things Than To Break Them.

Thou Shalt Not Covet Thy Neighbor's House Unless They Have A Well-stocked Bar.

Set Up Another Case Bartender! The Best Thing For A Case Of Nerves Is A Case Of Scotch.

What Would You Do If You Were President, And, On The First Day Of May, The Russian Ambassador Presented You With A Beautiful Cake Which Emitted A Curious Ticking Noise? Would You Plunge It Into A Pail Of Water - Thus Insulting Soviet Cuisine In General?

California Is The Only State In The Union Where You Can Fall Asleep Under A Rose Bush In Full Bloom And Freeze To Death.