President Bush Announced A Billion Dollar Mission

Strange Medical News From Pakistan: A Man Had A Successful Organ Transplant With A Dog. They Gave The Man A Dog's Organ. In A Related Story Today, Keith Richards Was Seen Chasing A Mailman.

A Telephone Survey Says That 51 Percent Of College Students Drink Until They Pass Out At Least Once A Month. The Other 49 Percent Didn't Answer The Phone.

I Enjoyed Retirement The Right Way Linguine Con Vongole, Red Wine And Plenty Of Truffle Cheese.

Today, John Kerry Announced A Fool-proof Plan To Wipe Out The $500b Deficit. John Kerry Has A Plan, He's Going To Put It On His Wife's Gold Card.

On Sunday, The President Flies To The Azores Islands To Attend A Summit With British Prime Minister Tony Blair And Spanish Prime Minister Jose Aznar, And Here's My Prediction: Bush Gets Voted Off.