New Study Reveals Men Like To Cuddle.

...why Were You Happier When You Were A Kid? Because You Didn't Know Anything. The More You Know, The Sadder You Get.

Senator John Kyle Claiming That Over 90 Percent Of What Planned Parenthood Does Is Abortion. Stephen Colbert: Over 90 Percent, That Is Unbelievable...in That It Is Not True. Only 3 Percent Of What Planned Parenthood Does Is Abortion. Kyle Just Rounded It Up To The Nearest 90.

Opinions Are Like Demo Tapes. I Don't Want To Hear Yours

I'm More American Than Apple Pie. I'm Like Apple Pie, With A Hot Dog In It.

So My Heart Goes Out To Them. Figuratively. I Would Never Actually Entrust My Heart To Scientists—they'd Probably Implant It In A Baboon. And A Baboon With My Heart Would Be Practically Unstoppable. Baboon Strength And Agility Combined With My Determination And Media Savvy? It Would Be A Threat To All Of Humanity.