In Real Life, I Tend To Yell

As I Examine My Life Through This Book, I Can't Help But Wonder If My Mother Was Right. Maybe I Really Was What I Ate. And Maybe If She'd Let Me Eat A Little More Sugar, I'd Have Come Out Sweeter.

Ambien Might Have Mentally Just Tossed My Salad. With Croutons.

Despite My Best Efforts, I'm Not Quite Perfect. Let's Just Say I'm Like One Of Those Hopi Blankets Where They Leave A Tiny Flaw So As To Not Affront The Lord.

Seriously, Our Nation Is Never Going To Be On The Same Page On Issues Like Gun Control, Welfare, The Economy, The Environment, Etc. I Doubt We'll Ever Come To Terms On Tastes Great Or Less Filling And Hybrids Versus Hummers, And There Will Always Be Yankees Fans And Red Sox Fans, And Never The 'twain Shall Meet. Fortunately, All It Takes For Us To Be Of One Mind Is Some Buttercream Frosting.

You Think You're So Cool Just Because You Can Walk!