I Don't Know, People Take Chances On

It Sucks Being Fat, You Know.

I Don't Know What People Are Going To Think Of My Stand-up. If You Only Know Me From 'the Price Is Right' And 'the Drew Carey Show,' Then You Might Be A Little Bit Shocked. I'm A Little Dirty And A Little Opinionated But All In Fun.

When I'm Working, I'm Going To Avoid All Media. No Newspapers, No Magazines, No Movies, No Radio, No Tv. I'm Just Going To Do Creative Work.

I Can't Do That. I'm Already The Single Guy Living In His Parents' House. I Can't Be Seen Digging A Grave In The Middle Of The Night.

Some People Don't Like Competition Because It Makes Them Work Harder, Better.