I Can Speak Esperanto Like A Native.

If A Man Dies When You Hang Him, Keep Hanging Him Until He Gets Used To It.

In The Human Race Today, You Came Last.

You Can Fool Some Of The People All Of The Time, And All The People Some Of The Time, Which Is Just Long Enough To Be President Of The United States.

I Thought I'd Begin By Reading A Poem By Shakespeare, But Then I Thought, Why Should I? He Never Reads Any Of Mine.

In India A Farmhand Was Caught In The Act With His Cow. He Said He Had Bad Eyesight And Thought It Was His Wife.