Hors D'oeuvre: A Ham Sandwich Cut Into

I Feel Responsible For Johnny Ray's Success. See Many Years Ago I Asked Him To Be On My Show And He Asked For A Lot Of Money And I Cried. And He Stole That From Me.

A Rich Man Is One Who Isn't Afraid To Ask The Salesperson To Show Him Something Cheaper.

Modesty Is My Best Quality.

A Scout Troop Consists Of Twelve Little Kids Dressed Like Schmucks Following A Big Schmuck Dressed Like A Kid.

I'm Like Will Rogers, I Never Met A Man I Didn't Like... Well, Eichmann Maybe.