Having 'best Friends' Is - At Least

Graham Greene Famously Said That All Writers Need A Chip Of Ice In Their Heart; Cusk Can Come Across As The Most Beautiful Ice Palace Of Stalactites And Stalagmites, And Some People Find Her Company, Albeit By Proxy, About As Inviting As A Long Weekend In A Walk-in Frigidaire.

Some Say That Cusk Has No Sense Of Humour, But Expecting Giggles From This Writer Would Be Akin To Expecting Sonnets From Benny Hill.

As A Precocious Teen I Dreamed Of Being Graham Greene. Well, As It Turned Out, I Never Wrote A Great Novel, Sadly, And I Never Converted To Catholicism, Happily, But I Did Do One Thing He Did. That Is, In Middle Age I Moved To A Seaside Town And Got Into A Right Barney With The Local Powers-that-be.

I Almost Choke On My Popcorn When I Hear Film Stars, Who Walk On Red Carpets As Much As The Rest Of Us Do On Zebra Crossings, Criticising Youngsters Who Crave Fame.

I Jest, Of Course; Premature Ejaculation Isn't A Laughing Matter For Anyone, Except For Your Friends When You Tell Them About It On The Phone The Next Morning. My First Marriage Ended Because The Main Event Was Invariably Over Before My Husband Got His Socks Off.