As A Comic, You Try Something And

If I Won The Lottery I'd Start A Charity That Helped Little Family Hardware Stores, Cobblers And Fruit Shops Open In City Centres.

Honestly, Sometimes I Get Really Fed Up Of My Subconscious - It's Like It's Got A Mind Of Its Own.

I Suppose The Common Idea Of Me Is That I'm Going To Be Someone Who's Hyper And Cracking Jokes All The Time, But People Who Meet Me Are Soon Disabused Of That Notion.

If Someone Starts Agreeing With Me, I Don't Like It. Out Of Pique, I Become Something Else.

Dire Straits Is A Great Band. Someone Tells You They Like ""brothers In Arms"" And Immediately You Know They're A Stupid Annoying Git.