You Transition As A Mother From Literally

Politics And Prostitution Have To Be The Only Jobs Where Inexperience Is Considered A Virtue. In What Other Profession Would You Brag About Not Knowing Stuff? “i’m Not One Of Those Fancy Harvard Heart Surgeons. I’m Just An Unlicensed Plumber With A Dream And I’d Like To Cut Your Chest Open.” The Crowd Cheers.

Never Tell A Crazy Person He’s Crazy.

I Was Taken To An Examining Room Where A Big Butch Nurse Practitioner Came In And Asked Me If I Was Pregnant. “no Way!” Was I Sexually Active? “nope!” Had I Ever Been Molested? “well,” I Said, Trying To Make A Joke, “oprah Says The Only Answers To That Question Are ‘yes’ And ‘i Don’t Remember.’ ” I Laughed. We Were Having Fun. The Nurse Looked At Me, Concerned/annoyed.

In Into The Woods, Cinderella Runs From Her Prince, Rapunzel Is Thrown From A Tower For Her Prince, And Sleeping Beauty Just Thought She Was Getting Coffee With Bill Cosby.

When You Go Into Something Where You Can Really Trust That Everyone Has Thought About It, More Than You Have Even, Then That's Like A Gift.