You Know, Men And Women Are A

Have You Seen That Magazine Barely Legal? That Means When You Look At It, You're Almost A Pedophile.

So, I Travel A Lot. I Hate Traveling, Mostly 'cause My Dad Used To Beat Me With A Globe.

Women Have All The Power Because Women Have All The Vaginas.

You Know What Wakes Me Up? A Tongue In The Ass. There Is No Alarm Clock On That One, You Are Up, You Are Shaking, You Are In A Karate Stance.....the Day Has Begun.

I've Never Had A Surprise Birthday Party. I've Had Every Other Type Of Surprise. I've Had Surprise Beatings, Surprise Drug Tests, Surprise Daughter I Think.