Write The Kind Of Story You Would

I've Come To The Conclusion That, Aside From Nazis, The Taliban, And Possibly The Honey Badger, There Is No One On The Planet More Merciless Than A Teenage Girl Once She's Decided She Dislikes You.

No Matter How Nice The Company One Might Be With, However, It Is Never Pleasant To Have A Rifle Pointed At One's Back.

But Things Were Different Now. I Finally Had My Head -pun Intended- On Straight.

This Was Very Exciting. I'd Never Had Two Boys Get Into A Fight Over Me Before. The Fact That One Of The Boys Was My Stepbrother, However, And Held About As Much Romantic Appeal For Me As Max, The Family Dog, Somewhat Dampened My Enthusiasm. And Michael Wasn't Much Of A Catch, Either, When You Actually Thought About It, Being A Potential Murderer And All. Oh, Why Did I Have To Have Such A Couple Of Losers Fighting Over Me? Why Couldn't Matt Damon And Ben Affleck Fight Over Me? Now That Would Be Truly Excellent.

Even Though I Loved To Write, I Never Liked English Lit. Class Very Much. I Think It Ruins Books When You Dissect Them Too Much. I Liked My Art Classes Best.