Why Write About The Past? Well, There's

I Don't Want To Have To Start Being Unselfish Again. The Great Thing About Being On Your Own Is You Do What You Damned Well Like.

Life Is A Terminal Disease, And It Is Sexually Transmitted.

I Think The Hard Thing For Young Comedians Is That The Majority Of The Young People In The Audience Out There Don't Have The Wide Range Of References.

I Wish You Wusses Would Stop Whining About Your Unhappiness. I'm Really Fed Up With It. Pour Yourself A Scotch And Pull Yourself Together. Go Out And Shoot Something!

We All Die At The End, But Does That Nullify Everything? Would Most People Rather Say, "i Wish I Hadn't Been Born?" Once You're Born You'll Have To Die, Now Is That Funny Or Sad?