What Does It Mean To Pre-board? Do

A Woman Told Me Her Child Was Autistic, And I Thought She Said Artistic. So I Said, 'oh Great. I'd Like To See Some Of The Things He's Done.

I Think Tv Remotes Should Have A Button That Allows You To Kill The Person On The Screen.

Some People Try To Get Out Of Jury Duty By Lying. You Don't Have To Lie. Tell The Judge The Truth. Tell Him You'd Make A Terrific Juror Because You Can Spot Guilty People.

I Think Of Shock As Kind Of An Uptown Form Of Surprise. Comedy Is Filled With Surprise, So When I Cross A Line... I Like To Find Out Where The Line Might Be And Then Cross It Deliberately, And Then Make The Audience Happy About Crossing The Line With Me.

It Used To Be Cars Had Cool Names: Dart, Hawk, Fury, Cougar, Firebird, Hornet, Mustang, Barracuda. Now We Have Elantra, Altima, Acura, Lumina, Sentra, Corolla, Maxima, Tercel. Further Proof That America Has Lost Its Edge.