Usa Today Has Come Out With A

Security Here In New York City Is Still Very Tight. Hookers In Times Square Now Are Demanding Two Forms Of Fake Id.

President Bush Has Been Silent On Schwarzenegger. Of Course, He Can't Pronounce Schwarzenegger.

Well, We're Just A Couple Of Weeks From New President Barack Obama Being Sworn In. And He's Been Very Busy Naming A Lot Of Cabinet Positions. And Today He Announced That He Wants The Surgeon General To Be Tv Dr. Sanjay Gupta. That Was The Kid On 'american Idol,' Wasn't It?

God Forbid I Should Be The Last One To Criticize, But I Think May Be Howard Dean Has A Bit Of A Problem Because Earlier Today During A Debate In New Hampshire, He Bit Off Joe Lieberman's Ear.

Newt Gingrich Had A Horrible Week In The Iowa Caucuses. Only 13 Percent Of His Ex-wives Voted For Him.