Today's Sensitive Male Has Learned To Share

Life Is A Sexually Transmitted Terminal Disease.

The Idiot Who Invented Instant Grits Also Thought Of Frozen Fried Chicken, And They Ought To Lock Him Up Before He Tries To Freeze-dry Collards.

The Only Way That I Could Figure They Could Improve Upon Coca-cola, One Of Life's Most Delightful Elixirs, Which Studies Prove Will Heal The Sick And Occasionally Raise The Dead, Is To Put Bourbon In It.

If Love Were Oil, / I'd Be About A Quart Low.

In The South There's A Difference Between 'naked' And 'nekkid.' 'naked' Means You Don't Have Any Clothes On. 'nekkid' Means You Don't Have Any Clothes On And You're Up To Somethin'.