Today Homeland Security Chief Tom Ridge Lowered

Happy Birthday To Former First Lady Barbara Bush, Who Turned Seventy-seven This Week. Unfortunately, Where Her Granddaughters Helped Blow Out The Candles On Her Cake, It Exploded.

In Massachusetts, Scientists Have Created The First Human Clone. The Bad Thing Is That In Thirty Years, The Clone Will Still Be Depressed Because The Boston Red Sox Will Still Have Not Won A World Series.

Comedy Doesn't Always Have To Come From A Dark Place.

There Are 300,000 New Jobs And Bush Said He's Confused, 'can I Take Credit For Good News That I Didn't Even Make Up?'

People Here In Los Angeles Are Disgusted Now About A Sex Scandal Involving Arnold Schwarzenegger. Apparently For Seven Years, He Carried On A Sexual Relationship With His Own Wife.