This Car Is More Fun Than The

The Fact Is That Britain Is The Most Warlike Nation On Earth. In The History Of Armed Combat, We Are The Only Democracy To Have Declared War On Another Democracy - England Versus Finland In The Second World War, In Case You're Interested - And We're Always At The Front Of The Queue When Johnny Foreigner Gets A Bit Uppity. Who Stood Up To The Kaiser? Who Stood Up To Adolf? And Let's Not Forget The Argies. What Other Country Would Have Sent Its Fleet Halfway Round The World And Lost 250 Men To Protect A Flock Of Sheep And Some Oil That Might Or Might Not Be There? We're Still At It.

When You've Finished Using A Car, Put The F***ing Seat Back, So Humans Can Use It Afterwards.

I Therefore Have To Use The Force. And Weirdly, This Doesn't Work Very Well. I Don't Understand Why, Because On The Last Census, I Put My Religion Down As Jedi Knight.

Looking Good In Italy Is Even More Important Than Looking Where You're Going.

I'm Having A Nice Cold Pint And Waiting For This To Blow Over.