The Prison Scandal Is Really Hurting President

Apparently, Six Women Claim That Arnold Schwarzenegger Groped Them While Working On His Movies. Hats Off To These Women Who Admit They Worked On Arnold's Movies.

It's Not A Big Part, ... I Wheel In An Ultrasound Machine And Say To Taylor's Gynecologist, 'if You Have A Problem With It, Just Give It A Light Tap On The Side.' Then They Hand Me A Urine Sample, And I Put It Up To The Light And Say 'hmm, Looks Pretty Healthy, But I'll Check.'

Bush Said The Unemployment Situation Is Turning Around. Last Week Alone, 5,000 People Started Working For John Kerry.

Today, John Kerry Announced A Fool-proof Plan To Wipe Out The $500b Deficit. John Kerry Has A Plan, He's Going To Put It On His Wife's Gold Card.

Boeing Is Working On An Invisible Fighter Jet So Nobody Can See Who's Flying It. Didn't George Bush Fly This In The National Guard, I Believe?