The Palm Is A Joint For Sadists

Speaking Of Birthdays, Our Firstborn [recently Turned 2]. As Parents Sometimes Fondly Do, We Reminisced A Bit About His Early Days On Earth-the Excitement, The Wonder, The Fears When We Brought Him Home. His Every Squeak Or Squawk We Were Sure Heralded Some Terrible Crisis; I Tested The Warmth Of Formulas From Dusk To Dawn, It Seemed. We Were So Germ-conscious My Wife Even Sterilized The Skin Of The Oranges Before Squeezing Them. How Firstborns Ever Survive Their Parents' Attentions Is Beyond Me. However, They Do, And He Did, And, In Spite Of Our Efforts, He Turned Out To Be Quite A Good Guy.

Real Writers-that Is, Capital W Writers-rarely Make Much Money. Their Biggest Reward Is The Occasional Reader's Response.... Commentators-in-print Voicing Big Fat Opinions-you Might Call Us Small W Writers-get Considerably More Feedback Than Writers. The Letters I Personally Find Most Flattering Are Not The Very Rare Ones That Speak Well Of My Editorials, But The Occasional Reader Who Wants To Know Who Writes Them. I Always Happily Assume The Letter-writers Is Implying That The Editorials Are So Good That I Couldn't Have Written Them Myself.

Sm Is An Abbreviation Of Both Stock Market And Sadomasochism-- And There Are Those Who Think They Are One And The Same.

For Corporations To Be Bedfellows With The Arts Is Good Business For Both. The Architecture That Houses A Company Is A More Visible Statement Than The President's In The Annual Report. Ditto Interiors, Particularly Of Offices And Sometimes, Dramatically, In Plants. For Solvent Businesses, Support Of Community Cultural Undertakings In Music, Drama, Dance Creates Great Goodwill. Also, The Existence Of Such Activities Is Often Important To The Executives And Their Families That Companies Want To Keep Or Attract To Keep.

After 40, One's Face Begins To Tell More Than One's Tongue.