So About 80 Years After The Constitution Is Ratified, The Slaves Are Freed. Not So You'd Really Notice It Of Course; Just Kinda On Paper. And That Of Course Was At The End Of The Civil War. Now There Is Another Phrase I Dearly Love. That Is A True Oxymoron If I've Ever Heard One: "civil War." Do You Think Anybody In This Country Could Ever Really Have A Civil War? "say, Pardon Me?" (shoots Gun) "i'm Awfully Sorry. Awfully Sorry."

-George Carlin

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So About 80 Years After The Constitution

George Carlin

So About 80 Years After The Constitution Is Ratified, The Slaves Are Freed. Not So You'd Really Notice It Of Course; Just Kinda On Paper. And That Of Course Was At The End Of The Civil War. Now There Is Another Phrase I Dearly Love. That Is A True Oxymoron If I've Ever Heard One: "civil War." Do You Think Anybody In This Country Could Ever Really Have A Civil War? "say, Pardon Me?" (shoots Gun) "i'm Awfully Sorry. Awfully Sorry."

Topic

Country

Sorry

Philosophy

I've Begun Worshipping The Sun For A Number Of Reasons. First Of All, Unlike Some Other Gods I Could Mention, I Can See The Sun. It's There For Me Every Day. And The Things It Brings Me Are Quite Apparent All The Time: Heat, Light, Food, And A Lovely Day. There's No Mystery, No One Asks For Money, I Don't Have To Dress Up, And There's No Boring Pageantry. And Interestingly Enough, I Have Found That The Prayers I Offer To The Sun And The Prayers I Formerly Offered To "god" Are All Answered At About The Same 50% Rate.

Funny

Prayer

Numbers