Sex Hasn't Been The Same Since Women

Baptists Never Make Love Standing Up. They're Afraid Someone Might See Them And Think They're Dancing.

The Only Way That I Could Figure They Could Improve Upon Coca-cola, One Of Life's Most Delightful Elixirs, Which Studies Prove Will Heal The Sick And Occasionally Raise The Dead, Is To Put Bourbon In It.

The Game Of Life Is A Lot Like Football. You Have To Tackle Your Problems, Block Your Fears, And Score Your Points When You Get The Opportunity.

I'd Much Rather Sit Next To A Smoker In A Restaurant Than A Nose-blower.

If You Are Not The Lead Dog, Your Scenery Never Changes.