Never Give A Sucker An Even Break.

Children Should Neither Be Seen Or Heard From - Ever Again.

I Have Spent A Lot Of Time Searching Through The Bible For Loopholes.

I've Been On A 46-year Diet Of Olives And Alcohol. The Latter I Consume. The Former I Save And Use Over Again In More Alcohol. In My Lifetime, I Imagine, I Have Consumed At Least $200,000 Worth Of Whisky.

Dentists, Lawyers, Doctors Are All A Bunch Of Thieving Bastards.

A Man Without A Woman Is Like A Neck Without A Pain.