My God, I'd Love To Smash Into

Being Short Never Bothered Me For Three Seconds. The Rest Of The Time I Wanted To Commit Suicide.

Tragedy Is When I Cut My Finger. Comedy Is When You Fall Into An Open Sewer And Die.

The Thing Is To Be Brave And Move The Audience With You, Instead Of Cater To The Lowest Common Denominator, You Know, Slipping On A Banana Peel And Falling On Your Ass. You Got To Move The Audience A Little Further Ahead In Terms Of Their Appreciation Of What Is Comedy. It's Complicated.

There's No Such Thing As Too Far. If It Works It's Funny, If It Doesn't Work It's Too Far, It's Stupid. Really There's No Such Thing As "too Far." You're Joining The Politically Correct When You Use Words Like "too Far." You Don't Want To Join The Army Of Politically Correct.

Nothing Is Free. You Got To Pay To Be In Society. First You Start With Homework.