Midnight, And The Kitties Are Sleeping.

The World's Oldest Woman Passed Away At 116. They Keep Dying. I Think That Title May Be Cursed.

Good Luck Finding A Place To Park In New York City. And When You Do, Good Luck Figuring Out The Parking Signs, Restrictions, And Prohibitions. It Is So Complicated. It Has Gotten So Bad, I Never Park My Car Without A Lawyer.

John Kerry Says That Foreign Leaders Want Him To Be President, But That He Can't Name The Foreign Leaders. That's All Right, President Bush Can't Name Them Either.

Let Me Just Say This: You Know Your Campaign Is Not Going Well When You Open A Press Conference By Saying, 'i Told You There Would Be More Lewd Photos'.

It's The First Day Of Spring. That Means This Weekend I'll Take Down My Christmas Lights.