Men Who Have A Thirty-six-tele Vised-football- Games-a-

Have You Any Idea How Many Children It Takes To Turn Off One Light In The Kitchen Three. It Takes One To Say What Light And Two More To Say I Didn't Turn It On.

When You're An Orthodox Worrier, Some Days Are Worse Than Others.

One Thing They Never Tell You About Child Raising Is That For The Rest Of Your Life, At The Drop Of A Hat, You Are Expected To Know Your Child's Name And How Old He Or She Is.

The Mole Rat Is The Only Rodent Born Without A Fur Coat. With A Good Lawyer, Someone Would Pay For That Little Oversight.

My Son Would Walk To The Refrigerator-freezer And Fling Both Doors Open And Stand There Until The Hairs In His Nose Iced Up. After Surveying $200 Worth Of Food In Varying Shapes And Forms, He Would Declare Loudly, 'there's Nothing To Eat!'