Life Should Imitate Romance Literature Far More

You Won't Find A Vampire In A Ford Fiesta

I Realized That I Was Really Tired Of People Popping On And Off Of My Property Like It Was A Train Station On The Supernatural Railroad.

Okay," I Said. "i'd Hoped To Avoid This, But... Bill, I Rescind Your Invitation Into My House." Bill Began Walking Backward To The Door, A Helpless Look On His Face, And My Brush Still In His Hand. Eric Grinned At Him Triumphantly. "eric," I Said, And His Smile Faded. "i Rescind Your Invitation Into My House." And Backward He Went, Out My Door And Off My Porch. The Door Slammed Shut Behind (or Maybe In Front Of?) Them.

Silver, Gold - I Don't Discriminate! I Like Sparkly Things.

That's Just Not Right," Sam Muttered. "claude Needs To Keep His Pants On.