Jim Gilmore Was The Only Gop Candidate

A House Panel In Texas Has Approved Full Marijuana Legalization For The State. Yeah, Meaning Texas Could Go From Having Dude Ranches To 'dude, Ranches.'

Apple Is Apparently Building A Large Solar Energy Farm In North Carolina. And If There's Any Justice, The Minute They're Done Building It, God Will Introduce A Newer, Smaller Sun That's Not Compatible With Their Machinery.

After Facing Backlash From Customers, Subway Says It Will Remove A Chemical In Its Bread That Is Also Found In Yoga Mats. Some People Were Like, 'you Mean I've Been Eating A Dangerous Chemical?' While Most People Were Like, 'you Mean I Can Eat My Yoga Mat?'

Former New York Governor George Pataki May Enter The Race For President. It's Not Definite, But He Tweeted That He'll Announce His 2016 Plans On May 28 In New Hampshire. Well, What's He Gonna Do, Go To New Hampshire To Say He's Not Running? That's Like Getting Down On One Knee And Saying, 'i Think It's Time To See Other People.'

Iran Said It Will Give Up Trying To Make A Nuclear Weapon. But It Got Awkward When Iran Said, 'but Just For Lent. We'll Start Again On Monday.'