Jesus Christ Can't Hit A Golf Ball

I Dreamed One Night That I Had 17 Holes-in-one And One Two, And When I Woke Up I Was So Goddam Mad.

This Is A Game Of Misses. The Guy Who Misses The Best Is Going To Win.

I Play Golf With Friends Sometimes, But There Are Never Friendly Games.

People Have Always Been Telling Me What I Can't Do. I Guess I Have Wanted To Show Them. That's Been One Of My Driving Forces All My Life.

Hitting A Golf Ball And Putting Have Nothing In Common. They're Two Different Games. You Work All Your Life To Perfect A Repeating Swing That Will Get You To The Greens, And Then You Have To Try To Do Something That Is Totally Unrelated. There Shouldn't Be Any Cups, Just Flag Sticks. And Then The Man Who Hit The Most Fairways And Greens And Got Closest To The Pins Would Be The Tournament Winner.