I've Been Nominated For Emmys And Golden

My Father Could Swear In Gaelic And English, By The Way, Ladies And Gentlemen.

I'm A Pretty Boring Guy. Compared To Ashton Kutcher, I Live A Really Boring Existence.

Don't Buy The Toys That Make The Noise!

Everyone's Got Skeletons In Their Closet, And I've Got A Million In Mine, Believe Me. I Tested The Envelope; I Pushed It. Whenever Somebody In Authority Told Me Not To Do Something, I Did It Just To Find Out Why They Said Not To Do It.

I Have Good Kids, I Love My Kids. I Try To Bring Them Up The Right Way, Not Spanking Them. I Find That I Don't Have To Spank Them. I Find That Waving The Gun Around Pretty Much Gets The Same Job Done!