Is America Ready For A Black President?

The Key To Staying Together Is Making Sure You Guys Like Each Other And Need Each Other.

I've Told Michael Jackson Jokes. If You Got Really Technical, You Could Say Those Are Jokes About Child Molestation. You Could, If You Got Technical. A Lot Of This Is Just Selective Outrage Because Honestly, The Audience Are The Ones That Tell Us That Something Shouldn't Be Spoken. The Audience Lets Us Know. And I've Never, In My Almost 30 Years Of Being A Comedian, Seen A Comedian Continue To Tell A Joke That The Audience Doesn't Respond To. I've Never Seen It.

The Government Doesn't Want You To Use Your Drugs, They Want You To Use Their Drugs.

Before I Was A Comedian, I Thought The Coolest Thing That Would Happen To Me Was Being A Teenager... Boy, Was I Wrong!

Nobody Really Wants To Be A Stand-up, They Want To Get On Tv.