I'm Going To Start Water Skiing Someday...as

My Mother Was The Worst Cook Ever. In School, When We Traded Lunches, I Had To Throw In An Article Of Clothing.

Marrying A Divorced Man Is Ecologically Responsible; In A World Where There Are More Women Than Men, It Pays To Recycle.

The Time You Spend Grieving Over A Man Should Never Exceed The Amount Of Time You Actually Spent With Him

I Was A Vegetarian Until I Started Leaning Toward The Sunlight.

Men Hate To Lose. I Once Beat My Husband At Tennis. I Asked Him, "are We Going To Have Sex Again?" He Said, "yes, But Not With Each Other."