I'm Afraid Of Sharks - But Only

Checkers Taught Me That A King Is A Man With Another Man On Top Of Him. But Life Taught Me That That's Actually Called A Queen.

I Was Student Council President In High School, And Even In Law School, I Was Vice-president Of The Student Bar Association.

The Question Is, 'how Bad At Sports Were You As A Kid?' I Grew Up Near Where They Film Jersey Shore. If You Weren't Tan, Muscular, And Book-averse, You Were A Dork And A Nerd And A Geek And Stuff. I Remember Being Into Gary Larsen, Stephen Wright, Peter Sellers.

You Are Ten Times More Likely To Get Hit By A Car When The Driver Is Aiming For You.

Separate But Equal Is Terrible For Education But It's Perfect For Eyebrows.