I'll Never Forget My Grandmother's Last Words.

My Girlfriend And I Went To A Dinner Party The Other Night And We Ended Up Playing Charades. There Was Another Couple There That Was Deaf. They Were So Good.

I Was Just Thinking How Unfortunate It'd Be To Be A Fat Girl Named Candy.

I Don't Want To Do An Edgy Show, I Didn't Want Bad Language. I Think Edginess Is The New Hackiness.

Element Of Surprise Is Really Fun For Me In Comedy. I Have To Be Surprised, And Everything's Been Done.

I'm Not Versed Enough In Constitutional Law To Run For Office. I'd Have To Go Back To School Or Something.