If You Watch Tonight's Show, I Believe

Fall To Your Knees And Thank God For Fox News. Pray For Roger Ailes And Rupert Murdoch. Pray For Them. Pray For Strength And Spine, And Pray That Everybody Involved Has Chicken Salad For Lunch So It Doesn't Clog Anybody's Arteries. Keep Them Going.

You Cannot Take Away Freedom To Protect It, You Cannot Destroy The Free Market To Save It, And You Cannot Uphold Freedom Of Speech By Silencing Those With Whom You Disagree. To Take Rights Away To Defend Them Or To Spend Your Way Out Of Debt Defies Common Sense.

Whoever Thought A Tiny Candy Bar Should Be Called Fun Size Was A Moron.

I Was In Washington, D.c., On The Morning Show, By The Time I Was 18, Programming A Station By 19, No. 1 In The Mornings. I Think I Was Making, I Don't Know, A Quarter Of A Million Dollars By The Time I Was 25.

God Takes Attendance Every Day.