If You Want To Know Who Your

The One Thing I Remember About Christmas Was That My Father Used To Take Me Out In A Boat About Ten Miles Offshore On Christmas Day, And I Used To Have To Swim Back. Extraordinary. It Was A Ritual. Mind You, That Wasn't The Hard Part. The Difficult Bit Was Getting Out Of The Sack.

Now Most People Do Not Want An Ordinary Life In Which They Do A Job Well, Earn The Respect Of Their Collaborators And Competitors, Bring Up A Family And Have Friends. That's Not Enough Any More, And I Think That Is Absolutely Tragic - And I'm Not Exaggerating - That People Feel Like A Decent, Ordinary, Fun Life Is No Longer Enough.

I Started To Make Harder Jokes Before Anyone Else Did. And The Producers Would Get Anxious. They'd Say, 'that's A Little Bit Hard-edged, Isn't It?' And I'd Say, 'let's Just Try It And See How The Audience Reacts. If They Don't Like It, Let's Cut It Out.' And The Audience Roared With Laughter, So I Learned You Could Do This Harder Humor And People Loved It.

The English Contribution To World Cuisine: The Chip.

In Britain, Girls Seem To Be Either Bright Or Attractive. In America, That's Not The Case. They're Both.