If Opportunity Doesn't Knock, Build A Door.

My Wife Can't Figure Out What To Buy Me. What Do You Give A Man Who's Had Everything Up To Here?

My Wife Is A Real Puritan. She Thinks Licking The Stamp On The Envelope Of A Valentine Is Foreplay.

Remember When You Had Your Face Lifted... And The Guy Brought It Back.

Why Are We Honoring This Man? Have We Run Out Of Human Beings?

The Human Brain Is Special. It Starts Working As Soon As You Get Up And It Doesn't Stop Until You Get To School.