If I Wasn't A Comic Or Tv

Hollywood People Are Filled With Guilt: White Guilt, Liberal Guilt, Money Guilt. They Feel Bad That They're So Rich, They Feel They Don't Work That Much For All That Money - And They Don't, For The Amount Of Money They Make.

My Cranky Cardiologist Says I'm Destined To Die In The Kitchen.

I Work With A Place In Santa Monica Called Phase Iv. My Doctor Recommended Them To Me When I Started Losing Weight. They Help People Train For Things Like Triathlons Or Biking And Running Races. They Offer Physical Therapists, Testing, Lectures.

Vegas Is Everything That's Right With America. You Can Do Whatever You Want, 24 Hours A Day. They've Effectively Legalized Everything There.

What Right Does A Politician Have To Tell Me What I Can And Cannot Watch? Change The Channel If You Don't Like What's On Tv!