I'd Rather Fiddle With My Phone For

The Seventies Were My Fattest Decade. Overall I Think The Seventies Were Distinctly Bulbous. People Looked Chunky, Typefaces Were Rounded, Writing Implements Penile.

In Truth, Even If They Have An Imperfect Insight Into Their Own Methods, I Still Slightly Mistrust Writers Of Fiction Who Are Assured Literary Critics; It Makes Me Suspect That They Favour The Word Over The World It Should Describe. Such Scribes Fall Victim Too Easily To The Solecism Of Equating Style With Morality.

I'm An Anarchist. I'm Implacably Opposed To Heirarchical Systems Of Power And Control. I Also Mistrust Crowds, As They Often Operate According To Their Lowest Common Denominator. In Terms Of Evolutionary Psychology, The Crowd Is Very Close To A Herd Of Stampeding Wildebeest.

I Always Wanted To Write Fiction. Always. As Far Back As I Can Remember It's Been Integral To My Sense Of Myself - Everything Else Was Always A Displacement Activity.

So Heedless Have We Become Of Our Own Image That Second-hand Mobile Phones Now Invariably Come With A Sim Card Chock-full Of Discarded Intimacies.