I Was Eating Some Candy And Looked

Coffee Is Like A Bra. 3 Cups Is One Too Many.

There Are Two Kinds Of Jackets - Reversible, And Reversible But It's Hard To Zipper Up And It Looks Really Stupid.

To Me, Comedy Is A Game.

I Don't Usually Fly In First Class, But I Fart In First Class.

A Straw Enables You To Drink Without Using Your Wrist. A Straw Is Your Friend - Until You Lose Eye Contact With The Straw. Then It Will Betray You And Make You Look Like An Idiot.